I can't wait to see this piece from the 'Hawk:

I must remain tight-lipped, but can tell you my assignment involves Ed "Big Daddy" Roth, Pancho Villa, nuclear radiation, lost treasure, Mexican carnival sideshows, Tom Wolfe, alien autopsies, satanists, tequila, John Wesley Hardin, chupacabras, Aztec blood sacrifice, Mexican outlaw biker gangs, my dad, Pershing missiles, porn shops, peyote, Billy the Kid, eating brains, and a cursed hot rod.

I am not making any of this up.

Hunter Thompson, except without the drugs (other than the tequila...well, and the peyote), and a lot funnier I'll wager.