...reporting World War II. Strategy Page has given me a bunch of satirical essay ideas today:

HUNDREDS OF SAILORS STILL TRAPPED UNDERWATER

Victims' Families: Pearl Rescue Efforts "Disgraceful"

WHISTLEBLOWER REVEALS SUPERBOMB PLANS

Catholic Bishops Condemn Secret "Manhattan Project"

FDR WITH MISTRESS IN DEATH ROOM

Warm Springs Scandal – Old Flame Watches President Die
First Lady Outed As Lesbian

BURN BABY BURN

B-29 Crews Laugh, Take Photos as Thousands of Children Die

How about some better Headlines.

FDR forms Bi-Partisan War Cabinet.

Dem turns to bitterest enemy to lead Navy in desperate fight
after Pearl Harbor.

or even

President calls for Rationing, says we must all join fight.

or

Celebrities rally for War Bonds sale: Conservatives seen
lining up to buy instruments to increase government
Spending

But those are how things actually happened as opposed to how the modern rabid leftist would see them today.

You suck at this game. You lack the satire gene.

I think you need to do the story about the conspiracy theorists who claim that the Arizona was actually sunk by explosive charges planted by the Roosevelt administration after the faked attack by American planes painted to look like Japanese planes. Don't forget the theorist who drops firecrackers on a model boat to "prove" that airplanes couldn't have sunk the Arizona.

The first witnesses on the scene idetified the planes overhead as American, after all. Surely this is no coincidence!