They're making a biopic about John McCain.

They're talking up Ed Norton, Jr. for the lead role. My suggestion is in the title. What's yours?

Too bad Tony Hopkins is too old. He certainly could portray the barely restrained madness which is the McCain mannerism.

How about the guy who played Captain Kangaroo?

Oh. I forgot. He's dead.

Well maybe Mr. Greenjeans is available.

Susan Sarandon. Hands down.

Dern is genius. You have a career in casting. Too bad it couldn't end like the other Viet Nam saga Dern starred in, "Coming Home."

Sarandon would be my second choice. Hands down, tits taped.

Brilliant suggestion, Rand. The only problem with Dern is likely to be that he can't play the young McCain as credibly as Norton can play the old McCain.

How about that guy that played Woody on Cheers?

Norton would be good as the young McCain, but if we're casting the white-haired, campaign reform obsessed self-paradoy that McCain is today, I'd say the best actor for the role is Leslie Nielsen.

Actually, Herbert Lom, who played chief inspector Dreyfus in the old Pink Panther sereis would be a good fit. He and McCain share a passing resemblence, and John seems to be taking on some of the chief inspector's end-of-each-film personality traits more and more each day.