Someone tell Diane Feinstein. A man has invented a rapid-fire rubber-band machine gun that will spit out a gross of stretchy projectiles as fast as the user can turn the crank.

It's not one of the dreaded assault rifles, so it should pass muster with her. If it resembles an AK-47 though, look out. BATF agents will surround and burn this guy's house down, after a 40 day stand off where two people lose an eye and thirteen receive welts on various parts of their bodies. After action reports will praise the heroism of the agents for preserving our way of life, because if people are able to shoot rubber bands at a high rate of speed then the terrorists have won.