Princess Leia’s hair.
Category Archives: Humor
Nobody Does Similes
…like Lileks:
…the power stayed on, damn the luck. In fact the entire storm skirted us – 60 MPH winds downtown, but here at Jasperwood we just got gusts and downpours, the far edge of the mayhem. I was stupid enough to put fresh batteries in one of the lights, too. Now they’ll be useless the next time I need them. They will sit in the lantern for a year and quietly drain themselves, like old men peeing in their pants while they sleep.
There’s a lot more where that came from.
[Update a few minutes later]
I know, I say to read the whole thing, and I didn’t before I posted this. So farther down, I found this:
And must we start with a rap song? Must we? It was like the trailer for “Nanny McPhee Returns,” which have “Everything Little Thing She Does (is Magic)” by the Police to remind you that, you know, Nanny uses Magic. Nevermind that it seems to take place in England in the 30s. I doubt it’s in the movie itself, but when they stick in the Obligatory Pop Song it not only takes you out of the world they’ve constructed, you feel like you’re being treated like a fool. Don’t worry! It may be set in the past, icky icky, but it’s hip as all hell! Here’s a 25-year-old pop song to prove it!
I watched a dumb Jennifer Aniston flick on the plane yesterday (captive audience, not enough seat pitch to use the laptop), and one of the annoying things about it was the occasional rap in the soundtrack. Is there anyone who would not go to a movie if they knew there wasn’t rap in it (other than a movie about rap, that is)? Because I know at least one person with exactly the opposite opinion. Why do they feel the need to do that? What value does it add?
Two Randy Vicars
Iowahawk has the sordid tale:
It happened that in Washingtown-on-Beltway there once ministered to the shire folk two vicars of remarkable and resolute piety. Polite history shall record their names and peerages as the Reverend John St. Edwards, Lord Plaintiff of Durham, and the Reverend Albert des Gores II, Earl Carbonet of Greenhouse. It shall likewise note well that each man, in his fashion, was a virtuoso upon his respective pulpit. What it shan’t record, however, is each man’s slavish indenture to the base desires of the flesh. As every schoolboy knows, as well he does his Latin infinitives, few are those men whose breeches are immune to the Devil’s disturbances. In the case of our two ill-fortuned subjects, Lucifer himself seemed to take particular delight in presenting ribald temptations and the debasing consequences that follow. Herein lies their tale.
Well, it actually lies at the other end of the link.
Grand Canyons
I have to confess a little skepticism, though — there are no interstates above the Grand Canyon. The closest one, I-40, is sixty miles south of the rim.
Also, Apple’s new customer service.
I Hate When This Happens
This seems like a paramedic’s nightmare:
Police said that in their investigation they learned that the people inside the car were dressed as zombie costumes and they were headed to a party at the time of the crash.
Yeah, a likely story.
Sgt. Greg Stewart said people who witnessed the crash initially thought the victims’ injuries were much more serious, because of the zombie costumes.
“We’re glad that everyone is alive, despite being ‘undead’,” Sgt. Stewart said, referring to the costumes.
I think that this was just a probe of the defenses, myself.
Is Sex And The City…
Missile To The Moon
A movie review. That rocket looks a heckuva lot like a V-2, to my eye.
Iowahawk
Destroying America since 1996.
I think he’s a piker compared to Barack Obama, though.
The Rest Of The Story
The previously hidden verses of the Star Spangled Banner.
And to think that some people want to replace it with that commie song by Woody Guthrie.
Breitbart Better Get Confirmation
I’m not sure that Iowahawk really has the goods:
JOSH MARSHALL: hey has anybody seen weigel?? he’s usually here by now
EZRA KLEIN: idk thats weird i saw him at 2nd period editorial and he said he be here
MATTHEW YGLESIAS: does anybody else think Mr Krugman is kind of cute? 😉
JOSH MARSHALL: eeeewww gross
MATTHEW YGLESIAS: i mean 4 an old guy
JOSH MARSHALL: maybe,,, but he always has chunks of food in beard and his eyes are kinda crazy
EZRA KLEIN: idk, I think they’re kinda penetrating and intense like Robert Pattinson
SPENCER ACKERMAN: omg omg I <3 Robert!!!! SPENCER ACKERMAN: he is so dark and brooding & intense
It’s not that it’s not realistic. I just thought it was an email list, not a chatroom.