“Germany put together an incredible number of victories beginning with the annexation of Austria and the Sudetenland and continuing on into conference play with defeats of Poland, France, Norway, Sweden, Denmark, Belgium and the Netherlands. Their only losses came against the US and Russia; however considering their entire body of work — including an incredibly tough Strength of Schedule — our computers deemed them worthy of the #1 ranking.”
The US came in fourth, with only two victories — Germany and Japan.
It reminds me of the old joke that college football is the only sport where the champion is determined by drunks arguing in bars. Which is why they brought in the computers, I guess.
I have to say, the first thing I thought was an axe, not a shovel. And it took me a while to realize what the others were seeing. But then, I don’t frequent clubs where that sort of thing happens.
It’s time for the Federal Government to pass the baton. California’s current GDP is approaching the GDP of the US in 1958 of a bit more than $2 trillion in current dollars. All NASA money should be distributed to States according to Congress’s favorite formula for use “To provide for research into problems of flight within and outside the [E]arth’s atmosphere, and for other purposes.” The States would then have a chance to further freedom as a laboratory of aeronautics and space policy just as they have been a laboratory of democracy.
Iowahawk has discovered the most exciting new car model to be premiered by Congressional Motors. Behold, the Pelosi:
Sporty mag-style hubcaps and an all-new aggressive wedge shape designed by CM’s Chief Stylist Ted Kennedy slices through the wind like an omnibus spending bill. It even features an airtight undercarriage to keep you and a passenger afloat up to 15 minutes — even in the choppy waters of a Cape Cod inlet. Available a rainbow of color choices to match any wardrobe, from Harvest Avocado to French Mustard.
Inside, a luxurious all-velour interior designed by Barney Frank features thoughtful appointments like in-dash condom dispenser and detachable vibrating shift knob. A special high capacity hatchback holds up to 300 aluminum cans, meaning fewer trips to the redemption center. And the standard 3 speaker Fairness ActoPhonic FM low-band sound system means you’ll never miss a segment of NPR again.
Iowahawk has become Internationalhawk, perturbing Anglo-American relations with a new column on a British web site:
In the matter of politics you have “Tories” and “Labour” where we have “Republicans” and “Democrats”; just as our “lawyers” must pass the “bar exam,” I’m sure your “barristers” must pass some sort of “pub quiz.” In America we call our stupid white racists “crackers,” where I believe you refer to them as “scones” or “crisps” or something. But these minor language quirks are nothing compared to the many things we have in common. For example, did you know we also have a new Stalinist dictator, and he also turns out to be Brown?
The vicar had to undergo a delicate operation to extract the vegetable, one of a range of odd items medics in Sheffield have had to remove from people’s backsides or genitals.
Others include a can of deodorant, a cucumber, a Russian doll – and a carnation.
I really hate it when you accidentally fall bare-assed on a carnation.
[Update a while later]
This raised my eyebrows:
A hospital trust spokeswoman in Sheffield said: “Like all busy hospitals we do see some unusual accidents.
“But our staff deal with them in a discreet, professional and kind way.”
Yes, because there’s nothing more discreet than talking to a reporter for the Telegraph, and making it national (and on the web, therefore international) news.