Humor, Media Criticism, Political Commentary, Satire

A Dispatch From Sequesteria

5 Comments

It’s a report chock full of grue:

Some of us from NRO were assigned to a cluster of hovels and lean-tos that has come to be called Ezra’s Alley. Others of us are acres away, on a strip they call Boehner’s Run. Still others are unaccounted for.

There is word of potable water and even some fuel on the other side of the river. But all of the crossings are controlled by the warlords of Alexandria and their confederates. From the tales told of their depravity, you’d rather drown than be taken alive.

Oh, the humanity.

5 thoughts on “A Dispatch From Sequesteria”

  1. Heard on Beck’s show this morning Kraft has changed the Double Stuf Oreo to the 1.98 Stuf Oreo.

  2. It’s hard to believe all the hype, over a 2.4% cut in ANYTHING.

    My wife’s net pay went down more than 2.4% over the last 6 months, between insurance going UP and those taxes for working people that WEREN’T supposed to go UP, but DID, Doing the math, she got hit for a little over 3.7%.

    We’re still living indoors. We’re still eating regularly. We’re still paying ALL our bills. We’re NOT still buying pizza every Saturday night. We’re NOT still going to movies twice a month. I’ve QUIT drooling over bigger TVs. The 14 y/o, 55”, Toshiba, will have to do for a while longer.

    We’re still surviving here at home despite the ‘cutbacks’, and so will the Country survive.

    Chicken Little Obama is wrong and opportunistic IMHO. Even though The Godfather has gone home, to ruin Chicago once and for all, his lack of ethics remains strong in the WH. [sort of like the wave of evil behind Darth Vader when he walks through the room] His ‘never let a crisis go to waste’, idea is more than important to remember here. They’ve both CREATED and now want to take ADVANTAGE of the crisis.

    H3ll, this is what Glenn Beck said they’d do when he was trash talking Obama before the FIRST Campaign was over.

    1. What with the end of the Bush era tax cuts and the payroll tax cuts, a lot of people are seeing a real reduction in their paychecks. The federal budget is greater than last year, only not as much bigger as they’d like. And that lower rate of increase is supposed to be the end of the world as we know it? Screw them.

      Of course, Obama will do everything he can to make the “cuts” as painful as possible. He’ll cut muscle as much as possible while avoiding any cuts in the fat. You’ll likely never hear of the Deputy Assistant Undersecretary for Diversity or some such person being cut because no one will know or care.

  3. If the sequester is cutting Federal Government spending, I’ve been cutting my weight since 1974.

  4. The folks at Ace of Spades have been having fun with this. From a post about closing down control towers at rural airports:

    I peered out from beneath the tarp covering the Cessna. Dust and leaves blew over the Tarmac. The sky looked ominous, heavy with doom. People boarded small planes, lifted off into the clouds, others landed and deplaned, as if oblivious to the terrors lurking in the shadows, the deadly sequestration. I saw a man leave the baggage claim and get into a rental car. He actually just drove off, careless of the horrors all about. The minutes passed. Pilots and passengers went about with purpose, sleepwalking as the world crumbled. Somewhere a beer hissed as it was uncapped in the airport bar.

    I crawled back below the tarp, as I wept for our nation.

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