26 thoughts on “Obi-Wan Kenobi”

  3. So they supposedly got Kenobi the same day the Emperor disbanded the Senate? Coincidence? This reminds me of Mustafar-gate.

  4. I don’t usually side with Truthers, but they have a point — Mustafar is where all those seperatists were murdered. They say Kenobi killed them all, but he and Vader were the only survivors. His “death” is awfully convenient…

  8. They say Kenobi killed them all, but he and Vader were the only survivors.

    I heard Yoda survived. There’s a rumor that he is at Dantooine, but that’s pretty remote. Another rumor said his ship crashed at Dathomir. But I wouldn’t be surprised if he was hiding with those rebels at Yavin.

  9. I thought Yoda was killed in the Jedi’s failed coup. Yeah, it’s a 20 year old conspiracy theory, but I think the Palpatine Commission was a fraud. Watch the Zap-Ruder data tape — it’s banned on the Holonet, but it clearly shows then-chancellor shooting lightning bolts.

  10. I worked on the Defense Star project for twelve years as Director of the Maw Installation and acting director of PCDS division. Yes, we did go 300% over cost estimate on that job, but this is cutting-edge technology, and we have to protect our workforce or the droids will put us all on the streets.

    When they see it in action, I think the Imperial people will agree that despite unavoidable overruns the Defense Star was worth every penny of the taxpayer’s money.

    Hail the Emperor!

  11. The D-Star is space pork for Senators in the Mid-Rim systems, and everyone knows it. Over schedule and over budget so many times — I even hear they’re building a second one! WTF?

    Meanwhile, Incom, a private company, turns out light-speed stunt-fighters like nobody’s business at fixed price and delivery. Word is they’re even selling to the rebels on the side.

  12. Let’s make it clear – this was not a victory for Darth Vader, this was one for our boys in white. I think it’s sickening how he tries to take credit for this operation.

  13. Vader and Palpatine obviously sabotaged the Death Star. If it really happened the way the regime claims, it would be the first time in history a couple of proton torpedoes could blow up something that big.

  14. Vader said they’d release the holovid — where is it? They said Kenobi kidnapped Princess Leia and used her as a human shield. Where’s the proof? He was supposed to be an old man whose power were weak — where’s the evidence he was giving the rebels any orders?

    Further, there’s no proof whatsoever that electro-boarded rebels gave us the location of Kenobi. Let’s call that what it is — torture.

    Also, they deserve civilian trials on Coruscant, not held as “rebel scum” in the spice mines of Kessel forever.

  15. The Death Star to nowhere! Do we really need another Death Star to watch over a bunch of smelly Ewoks who’s only contribution to the Emperor’s Galactic Empire, PBUH, is the occasional song with a catchy back beat. But really once you’ve heard one Ewok beating on a bantha skull you’ve heard them all. Anyways, what’s their threat to the Empire? What? They gonna give us all fleas or something. Pssssh.

  16. If it really happened the way the regime claims, it would be the first time in history a couple of proton torpedoes could blow up something that big.

    I know, right? Look a little fighter with a couple wimpy torpedoes takes out the space station the destroyed Alderaan in one shot? No way. The same conspiracist tell me I should be afraid of the pesky Ewoks outside the compound. It’s a good thing they cloned the warriors in our society, because some people are just banta fodder.

  18. Do we really need another Death Star

    Hey, it’s better than that foolish TIE Defender program. 5 years, and all they have is a drawing that uses the same equipment as the crappy TIE Advanced, and it has enough problems itself. An extra solar array, a few more engines, but they still can’t get more than a single “test flight” out of the program.

    I heard those rebels designed and flew the first A-wing already and the total cost for that program is what TIE Defender spends in a month. At least when we were building the ol’ Bombers, we could do a reasonable test program and make a product that worked. Yeah, each one costs a billion corellian credits to operate, but it’s something. Still glad they will phase them out, but with what, I don’t know. It won’t be a TIE Defender.

  23. why do the Rebels hate us?

    That’s easy, it’s their sad devotion to that ancient Jedi religion. I’ll be happy when we finally get rid of Lord Vader. His sorceror’s ways only led us to destroy Alderaan (yeah, they had it coming), while Kenobi was hiding out at Tantooine all along. I heard Vader was even at the planet a few days before Admiral Motti destroyed Alderaan, and his Jedi “force” didn’t give him clairvoyance to find the rebel then. That’s why some think Alderaan was an inside job all along.

  24. That evil Empire needs to be snuffed out. When they come onto my turf they must know that they are going to be in a fight. (background music cues up)

    When you’re a Jeti you’re
    a Jeti all the way.
    From your first cigarette to
    your last dying day.

    When you’re a Jeti,
    If the spit hits the fan,
    You got brothers around,
    You’re a family man!

    You’re never alone,
    You’re never disconnected!
    You’re home with your own:
    When company’s expected,
    You’re well protected!

    Then you are set
    With a capital J,
    Which you’ll never forget
    Till they cart you away.
    When you’re a Jet,
    You stay a Jeti!

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