43 thoughts on “I Have Never Seen A Rambo Movie”

  3. I think I saw part of the second one. I think it was the second one. How many were there?

    I also haven’t sat through an entire Rocky movie. In fact, I think I’ve only watched three entire movies Stallone was in, one of which was actually pretty good.

    The other two were Tango and Cash and Judge Dredd. But at least Tango had Teri Hatcher in it.

  4. No Rambo? Clearly a sign of low testosterone. You should get that checked.

    McGehee – you gotta check out Demolition Man. It’s some of his finest work, and has a young Sandra Bullock.

  6. I also have never seen a Rambo movie, or any movie starring Angelina Jolie, Megan Fox, Heath Ledger, or directed by Michael Moore.

  7. You think that’s bad? I never saw The Godfather.

    Saw the first Rambo, and the sequel set in Afghanistan.

    I’ve seen only one Michael Moore movie, if Team America: World Police counts.

    I saw the ridiculous Tomb Raider movies.

    The Dark Knight was the only Ledger movie I ever saw.

    No Megan Fox flicks.

  9. Well Rambo movies are decidedly different types of movies from Rocky movies. Rambo the character was an intentional study in minimalist dialog. While not quite of the caliber of The Deer Hunter, “First Blood” (the first Rambo movie) was one of a few movies of the late 70’s/early 80’s that portrayed Vietnam vets sympathetically as abused and mentally wounded individuals. Preceded Full Metal Jacket, Platoon, Born on the Fourth of July, Good Morning Vietnam, and other gooksploitation films of the 80’s and early 90’s. John Rambo in First Blood is a classic anti-hero character.

  12. I liked Demolition Man. The acting was pretty good for a Stallone movie. You better agree or we’ll have to discuss the merits of certain films like Cobra (bottom line: ax murder cults bring down the property values and when they’re infesting their natural habitat, your standard Hollywood industrial “molten steel” setting, they’re as hard as roaches to eliminate) or the one that begins with “Rhine” and ends with “stone” (and starred Dolly Parton, so I hear).

  13. I saw Rambo I, II, III. The first one is probably the best one. Completely different from the other two. While the first one is plot driven (yes, even without him speaking all that much) the other ones are action movies with lots of explosions and things like that. The second movie is in Vietnam and the third in Afghanistan.

    I also saw Demolition Man, Judge Dredd, Tango and Cash, Rocky I,II,III, IV, Cliffhanger and Cobra. Of those I would probably recommend Rocky I and Demolition Man.

    As for Angelina Jolie, I think I started watching Tomb Raider once but the movie was too bad for me to continue. Regarding Megan Fox I actually managed to watch Transformers and thought it was a decent, although not great, movie.

  14. I have never seen a Harry Potter movie. I read 200 pages of the first book and decided it wasn’t my cup of cliches. AND I have two children in the demo so it’s not as if I wasn’t exposed.

  15. The first Rambo movie, FIRST BLOOD, is an actual good movie, and different from the two sequels. (I haven’t seen the most recent one, that came out a year ago.) Two and Three (especially Two) were enjoyable action movies, but the first one has more depth. After being largely monosyllabic most of the movie, Rambo finally breaks down and launches into an emotional tirade–he actually cries–and in his commentary on the DVD, novelist David Morrell (who wrote the book on which the movie was based) says there was buzz at the time that Stallone’s impassioned delivery of the soliloquy might earn him an Oscar nomination. Unfortunately didn’t happen.

    Alan K. Henderson writes: “The Dark Knight was the only Ledger movie I ever saw.” Try THE PATRIOT. The first fight scene, in which Mel Gibson’s embattled farmer arms himself (without a permit or seven-day waiting period) and his young sons to rescue captured Continental-soldier son (Heath Ledger) from the Redcoats, and “goes Rambo” on them, irked some “liberals” when the movie was released. That alone makes it worth seeing. Great tomahwaking, too.

  16. Really Brock? In defense of rambo and stalone you mention Demolition Man?

    Really?

    Cut him some slack. He was, after all, talking to somebody who saw Judge Dredd.

  17. I liked JUDGE DREDD. Not a lot, but I’ve seen worse. I liked the interplay between the Rob Schneider character and Dredd–especially Schneider imitating Stallone. Have only seen parts of DEMOLITION MAN but young Sandra Bullock is very cute and sexy in it, and I love the part where they go to a futuristic nightclub and the piano man is singing the Jolly Green Giant song.

  18. The first Rambo movie was much better that The Deer Hunter. In fact, TDH was just one cliche’ after another. No to mention there are no Glaciers in PA.

  19. I suggest you watch the original First Blood. The las one, Rambo IV, was actually very good too. The middle two, no so much.

  20. I’ll add my voice to the folks who have pointed out that the first Rambo movie was the best, and different in kind from its successors. I would aso point out that it was incredibly restrained in its violence as well — if I’m not mistaken, albeit there were many injuries, the body count was exactly two (the deputy who fell from the helicopter, and presumably the pilot of the helicopter).

    A case could be made that First Blood should be on the short list of great libertarian movies, since Rambo merely wanted to be left alone, but “the system” — and mostly the sheriff — couldn’t abide the non-conformity.

    I would also add that you shouldn’t plan on running for political office if you’ve avoided pop culture all these years. There was a brief period — approximately 1982 to 1988 — when I lived as a bachelor completely without television. I daresay my recollections of the 1980s are very different from those of most Americans. My visual memory of Challenger is almost entirely the one still picture that made the covers of magazines. I’ve never seen a single episode of Moonlighting or MacGyver. And just as Bush 41 was ripped as an out-of-touch patrician for not knowing the price of a loaf of bread, if the press gets wind that your knowledge of iconic American figures is weak, you’ll be toast. šŸ˜‰

    BBB

  21. As noted, Rambo I (First Blood), isn’t bad at all.

    Demolition Man, while possibly bad, is nonetheless a must-see for the hilarious cheesy distopian PC future (which, in a 1993 movie, included the Schwartzenegger Presidential Library!). As one character rants:

    ‘I’ve SEEN the future. Do you know what it is? It’s a 47-year-old virgin sitting around in his beige pajamas, drinking a banana-broccoli shake, singing “I’m an Oscar Meyer Wiener”.’

  22. “A case could be made that First Blood should be on the short list of great libertarian movies, since Rambo merely wanted to be left alone, but ‘the systemā€ ā€” and mostly the sheriff ā€” couldnā€™t abide the non-conformity.”

    In his video commentary Rambo creator David Morrell humorously mentions that his book came out circa 1970 (I forget the year, but I’m pretty sure the Vietnam War was still going on), and by the time the movie version was made, Rambo, with his muscular body, long hair and army-surplus jacket, didn’t look all that much different from a lot of mainstream guys. So when the movie was first shown in theaters, a lot of young people didn’t “get” why the sheriff thought Rambo was such a weirdo and outsider.
    ‘

  23. First Blood was my first exposure to ‘nam flicks. Seeing as how that war was before my time, that was a good primer for how those vets were treated. “They spit on me — call me ‘babykiller.'” — that line’s stuck with me to this day.

    Rocky is a total modern-day monomyth classic. IIRC, Stalone wrote the screenplay in 3 days in an apartment. Great raw, unpolished feel of raw, unpolished east coast characters. Burgess Meredith completely steals every scene he’s in.

    Demo Man was pure camp “brave new world” comedy. Funny to watch once. I’d cyber Sandra Bullock all day long.

  24. First Blood, like Rocky, was better than the rest of the sequels, and for the most part, the recent post-2000 sequels of both franchises were the best of all of the sequels according to most viewers. That can probably be attributed to the wont of studios to take over good projects to make money after their initial critical acclaim.

    I’ll agree, though, that both Demolition Man and Judge Dredd are good campy comedies, and when I used to have cable, I would catch their hilariously-edited versions on TBS quite often.

    And, thanks to the intertubes, now I know how to use the three seashells! šŸ˜‰

  25. Another vote for First Blood. I have not yet seen the last one but expect of someday.

    The best of the Vietnam pictures I have ever seen is the Mel Gibson movie ‘We Were Soldiers’. I read the Hal Moore book and though the movie only covers the first half it covers it very well.

    The list of movies I have never seen is very long but at the top has to be ‘Titanic’ (the Cameron remake) followed by Jaws and that misbegotten exploitation flick ‘ET’. My friends tell me it was so phony.

  26. I would aso point out that it was incredibly restrained in its violence as well ā€” if Iā€™m not mistaken, albeit there were many injuries, the body count was exactly two (the deputy who fell from the helicopter, and presumably the pilot of the helicopter).

    “First Blood” was on TV recently and I watched it for the first time in many years. The deputy fell from the helicopter and the pilot flew away. He wasn’t seen again but nothing happened to him.

    Overall, the movie isn’t all that bad. Some Vietnam vets don’t like it because it plays on the stereotype of the “messed up veteran.”

    The last movie in the series wasn’t half-bad, either. It kind of closed the loop on the story line.

  27. I’ve seen all the Rambo’s. I’ve seen all the Rockies. I’d have to say though that Ahnuld comes out ahead on the crazy action flick meter. Particularly, if you add the campy catch phrase metric.

    The scene at the beginning of Predator when Ahnuld and Apollo Creed meet and Ahnuld is like, “Son of a Bitch!” Then, they slap their meat paws together and flex their well oiled arm muscles. Ah, I tear up in the presence of such a magnificent moment of cinematic history.

  28. “Overall, the movie isnā€™t all that bad. Some Vietnam vets donā€™t like it because it plays on the stereotype of the ‘messed up veteran.'”

    I can understand that; but when Morrell conceived the character and wrote the book, the war was still going on and I don’t think the stereotype had really taken form at that point. I’m not even sure the stereotype was in place when the movie was made. There was ROLLING THUNDER in the mid-Seventies, but I got the impression that the protagonist in that (William Devane) was scarred not so much by his Viet Nam service per se, but by his excruciating experiences in the “Hanoi Hilton.”

  29. My favorite Sylvester Stallone movie has got to be “Oscar”. IMDB link on my name.

    Angelo “Snaps” Provolone made his dying father a promise on his deathbed: he would leave the world of crime and become an honest businessman. Despite having no experience in making money in a legal fashion, Snaps sets about to keep his promise. He is faced with numerous problems: henchmen who know nothing but crime, the police who are convinced he is hatching a master plan, and Oscar, who has just got his daughter pregnant.

  30. I saw the first Rambo. Agree with others that it wasn’t all bad. Never watched a Rocky movie, though I remember seeing parts of I think Rocky IV (the Russian fight, remember the scene where they measure his punching power).

    I have never seen any of the American Pie/Beauty movies either.

    I did see Demolition Man, and taken for what it really is, an Action-Comedy that goes out of its way to not take itself seriously; it is a funny movie. Taco Bell wins the restaurant war and becomes fine dining? That’s funny, even if it just a big commercial in the middle of a movie. No longer so funny is the toilet fines for cursing. With big brother cameras all around countries like Britain, that type of law enforcement is not far behind.

  31. I can understand that; but when Morrell conceived the character and wrote the book, the war was still going on and I donā€™t think the stereotype had really taken form at that point. Iā€™m not even sure the stereotype was in place when the movie was made.

    The “messed up Vietnam vet” stereotype was pretty common in the news and a great deal of popular entertainment back in the 70s and 80s. Whenever a Vietnam vet was shown at all, he was almost without exception a basket case of one sort or another. They were either crazed killers, drug addicts, or societal dropouts.

  32. Saw the first one a million years ago, never any of the others…. I still have yet to see a Rocky. American Beauty was awful…a galloping herd of cliches.

  33. Demo Man was a great comedic take on how our own society is succumbing to its own flavor of Orwellian impulses. The brand of newspeak in the movie is pretty lulzy and Sandra Bullock as a perky little repressed nympho proponent of the state is hilarious. That the Goldstein enemy of Nigel Hawthorne’s engineered society is a crass, wise cracking, ratburger eating Dennis Leary is both fitting and funny, and commentary on how normal Americans just dont buy the elitist BS that the leftards are continually trying to shove down our throats, that their “Sustainable Society” requires that 90% of us be ground down underneath it. Fantastic social satire.

  34. It occurs to me that I’ve never seen anything with Sylvester Stallone in it. I’ve also never seen any of the Godfather movies. Boxers, gangsters, big musclemen movies in general don’t interest me. I prefer fantasy or science fiction… Then again, I’ve never seen E.T. and don’t want to. To tell you the truth, I haven’t watched that many movies in my life. I prefer reading.

  35. The one movie that I always recommend to those that haven’t seen it is “The Princess Bride”.

  36. “To tell you the truth, I havenā€™t watched that many movies in my life. I prefer reading.”

    I’m with you, Andrea, though I have seen one movie (on video, or TV, can’t remember which) with Sylvester Stalone. Don’t remember the name, but it was a comedy, and actually pretty funny. I don’t think it was much of a success, though – guess the movie-going audience wanted him to play to type.

    I don’t go to a movie house much. Before I went with a friend I was visiting over the holidays to see The Blind Side in the theater (would have waited for the video if she hadn’t wanted to go too), I don’t think I’d been to the movies in over a decade. I generally don’t go to the movie house unless the movie needs to be seen (the first time) on the big screen – like Saving Private Ryan and Armageddon. I don’t generally even watch videos (or whatever they have these days) – I’m usually too busy to sit down for a couple of hours and just stare at the tube.

    Rand, I’d say you haven’t missed a damned thing.

  37. The one movie that I always recommend to those that havenā€™t seen it is ā€œThe Princess Brideā€.

    Agree.

  40. The biggest flaw in Demolition Man is the time-frame. Just ignore that the opening sequences are in 1996. It makes suspension of disbelief a lot easier.

    And remember – some genius at Taco Bell decided “In the future, all restaurants are Taco Bell” would be GOOD PR.

  41. Then again, Iā€™ve never seen E.T. and donā€™t want to.

    You’re not missing much. It’s basically “The Wonder Years” with a creepy alien puppet. You can almost hear the voice-over in your head:

    As I watched the creepy alien fly out of sight, I knew that a part of my childhood was gone…forever…/schmaltz

  43. Sadly, no, Alan. I haven’t watched SNL, or any teevee really for that matter, in years. Even with SNL, the signal-to-noise ratio is terrible. I only catch stuff online or on DVD, usually after someone says, “Titus, did you ever see…?” Maybe there’s a torrent…

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