I Don’t Exist

At least according to this web site, which says that there are zero people with the first name Rand, and zero people with the last name Simberg, in the US.

HowManyOfMe.com
Logo There are:
0
people with my name
in the U.S.A.

How many have your name?

This implies, of course, there are also zero people with both. I guess I’ll just have to disappear in a puff of logic.