According to Ananova:

Mike Tyson has been ordered to appear before the Nevada State Athletic Commission next Tuesday to explain his behaviour at this week’s press conference.

In the spirit of Opinion Journal’s contest to come up with excuses for Yasser Arafat and the mysterious weapons ship, I’d like to kick off a Transterrestrial contest to help gentle Iron Mike come up with an explanation for using Lennox Lewis’ lower limb as a chew toy.

Either post in the comments section or email me. And hurry–the poor guy only has until next Tuesday. I’ve already started it off with the post title.